Tuesday, October 17, 2006

A Freak Show...And Then Some News (Monday's First Hour)

Hello everyone. Did your week kick off to a rainy start too? What a mess. Well, let's get moving. We begin tonight with John Mark Karr. Wait. What?! Oh hell no! That's it. Hold up people, I've got to pause this review for a second. You know how on The Daily Show, Jon Stewart will sometimes ask someone to meet him at camera three? Yeah well I'd like to ask Anderson and Executive Producer David Doss to please meet me on my blog couch. Everybody comfy? Anderson would you like a Diet Coke? Okay, here we go. What the frack are you guys doing? I mean, seriously, John Mark Karr??!!! Are you kidding me with this stuff? I've got an easier question: What does CNN call itself? Anybody? CNN calls itself the most trusted name in news. How in the world am I suppose to trust CNN after what I just witnessed? You lead with John Mark Karr and don't even mention the earthquake that rocked Hawaii this weekend? Or what about the new explosive book from David Kuo on how some in the White House mock evangelicals? Either of these stories are a million times more newsworthy than what you just showed.

Look, I understand Larry King having the guy on. Larry is not a news show. Besides, I'm pretty used to that show being a bit of a circus anyway. You know what I'm talking about Anderson. How many completely bizarre handoffs have you had to endure? Plus those ties alone could scare small children. The thing is you guys are a news show and I therefore expect, well, news. Especially at the top of the hour. This was a disgusting ratings stunt and I'm disappointed in both of you. The last time John Mark Karr was discussed on the show was a few weeks ago during a sit down with Lisa Bloom and Jeffrey Toobin. I had this to say:
They sort of seriously discuss the case and then Anderson wants to know if this guy will write a book and do the tv circuit. This makes me want to cry. If 360 books him they are so on notice.
Okay, technically it was Larry King and not your show that actually booked him, but what you did tonight was pretty dang close, so you guys can consider yourselves almost on notice. If I see any more coverage of this freak, I will...I will...send you roaches. Yes, yes, that's right, Anderson. I will send you roaches. And David, I will...well I actually don't know what you're afraid of, but I have people who have a freakish amount of free time on their hands and they will find out. Live in fear boys. Oh and while I've got you here Anderson, dude, you have got to chill with the pen clicking. Seriously, take a Ritalin or something because you're driving my girl Liberation337 up a wall. Maybe she wouldn't have noticed the clicking so much tonight if you had been, you know, reporting actual news. Anyway, that's it. You're both free to go. Have a nice night and throw away your trash.

Alrightie, back to the review. As mentioned, we lead with John Mark Karr and some of his interview from Larry King. I try not to bang my head against the wall as I listen to the non killer of a decade old sensational non currently newsworthy murder story discuss (or actually not discuss) a maybe sex change. Arrgh!! I feel so informed! We then move into a David Mattingly piece on Karr and I will not be going into any details because it's pointless and unlike CNN apparently, I have standards. Oh, and for fun you can look at the corner of the tv screen and watch the last shred of CNN's credibility disappear. There they have a "John Karr speaks" graphic. Lord, help us all.

To completely waste everyone's time, joining us we have Lisa Bloom of Court TV, forensic expert Dr. Lawrence Koblinsky, and sexual disorders expert Fred Berlin. Geez, Lisa Bloom talks loud. Indoor voice, girl! We then have two Anderson pieces on the situation before going back to the panel. All in all this coverage comes to 32 minutes. Unbelievable.

Transitioning now to news on North Korea. I like how John Karr came first. Good to see CNN has its priorities straight. Anyway, Jamie McIntyre joins us live to inform us that US spy satellites have seen activity at nuclear sites, which may mean another test soon. We then move on to a Dana Bash piece on Kurt Weldon, a republican Pennsylvania congressman, who seems to be in some trouble. He's being investigated for possibly steering clients to his daughter's firm. That's a no no. After the piece Anderson talks about Harry Reid's land deal. I love how they feel they have to throw that out there to balance all the republican scandals. People on the right have practically been foaming at the mouth to get the nonstory out. I was on Brian William's blog earlier today and there were people accusing him of bias. I'm nonpartisan when it comes to corruption. I want that crook William Jefferson gone. But when it comes to Harry Reid there's nothing there.

On now to polls, polls, and more polls with, who else, Bill Schneider. I should just start calling him the Poll Man from now on. To summarize, things look bad for the GOP. Yay! But I'm not holding my breath. Of note is that the majority of Americans oppose military intervention when it comes to North Korea. Man, we think we have a quagmire now. Can you imagine that? Also, a small majority puts the blame for the current North Korea situation on the Bush Administration over the Clinton Administration. I'm not sure why we have to focus on blame here. It's a failure of policy, which is bad, but it's not anywhere near lying us into a war.

Previewing some of our next hour coverage, we have a piece from Gary Tuchman on children in a dual language immersion program. Basically the kids mostly learn in their native language (spanish) with english being slipped in a little more and a little more over time. The program of course has its critics. I don't know what to think. If it works than I'm all for it, but apparently the research is mixed. While chatting with the kids in the school, Gary registers his surprise to the claim that homework is fun. "What kind of school is this?" he asks, to the delight of all the kids. Seriously, he cracked those kids the hell up. So cute. Also extremely cute was at the end when one little girl waved and said, "thank you for coming." How polite. Aw, Gary totally deserved that after all those times being yelled at by fundamentalist Mormons. That's it for the first hour and since next hour is a special I'm going to grade each individually. This hour gets a D.

Do you share my outrage over the Karr coverage?

10 Comments:

Anonymous Mathilde said...

Disgusting. I admit I flipped over to the F-channel and Greta was doing an amusing job grilling the freak and his lawyer. The man (Karr not Anderson) is clearly mentally ill but he's having a great time f-ing with everybody's minds. I wonder if CNN has ever told Anderson to cover something & he's just been like "oh hell to the no!"

9:41 AM  
Anonymous Robyn (Liberation337) said...

OMG! That part about the clicking pen was just too funny. I don't think I've laughed that hard in a long time!! It was DRIVING ME INSANE though;) He did seem to kinda settle down later in the show when he got off the whole JMK thing and decided to keep his hands in his pockets. Great Blog last night BTW, can't wait for hour two.

10:14 AM  
Blogger Sheryn said...

Oh Eliza you hit it on the head girl!

I couldn't watch the train wreck. I wouldn't give John Mark Karr or AC360 my time or attention when they pull crap like that! Pity that they led with JMK on the night that they had the Population special. I didn't bother to watch either.

You know what burns me? The ratings will rock for that show because that's what people want to see. Sick, isn't it?

10:40 AM  
Anonymous Sharla said...

MADAGASCAR HISSING ROACHES!! I JOIN YOU ON THE BLOG COUCH!!

And the jacket. I swear Anderson- after we send you the roaches, I'm going to BURN IT.

11:18 AM  
Anonymous mathilde said...

I really don't think it's our boy's fault y'all. He has to do what they tell him. Notice how he rushed to end the Karr coverage? Or am I too indulgent?

11:42 AM  
Blogger eliza said...

Re: sharla
I'm sure you're right about the ratings. I'm afraid to look. It frustrates me to no end that people will watch pointless sensational news over stuff with substance. I would have turned it off myself if I wasn't doing a review for you fine folks.

I didn't even notice his jacket because I was too busy being mad at him. I don't post screencaps when they've done a particularly crappy show because I don't want the readers to be swayed by his aesthetic qualities. Heh.

Re: mathilde
It's got to be at least partly his fault. I'm always confused at how much blame he bears though. I just listened to an interview with him recently where he mentions that working for a big corporation, when they say jump, he has to say how high. But then again, he seems into this kind of stuff. I don't know, but it's his show, so he has at least some say.

12:16 PM  
Blogger midnite6367 said...

Great post Eliza. Last night's show was terrible. I don't want to hear one more word about JonBenet or Karr. I would've rather just listen to Anderson clicking his pen for an hour. I think a D is too high a grade for the show, it was a definite F and having that loudmouth Lisa Bloom on made it even worse for me, she's a grating NYC harpie. At least Jeff Toobin had the sense to stay of this mess. The second hour was a lot better, but frankly I don't know how I managed to make it up to that point.

If you have to send AC some roaches, I think you should throw in a couple of clowns along with them. That'll learn him!

7:06 PM  
Blogger eliza said...

Oh, I forgot about clowns! Hmm, perhaps roaches dressed as clowns? Obviously these details will need to be worked out. ;) There was some news, in the first hour, so I didn't go for the F. But believe me, I was tempted.

7:46 PM  
Anonymous full circle said...

Roaches dressed as clowns?! LOL.

8:33 PM  
Blogger eliza said...

Somebody else will have to dress them though. I don't like roaches either. Heh.

11:34 AM  

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