Saturday, September 16, 2006

Deadly Vegetables And Vegetative States

Hi everybody. I guess Anderson is either still traveling or is taking the night off because we've got John again. Oh well. John's in Washington for some reason and we begin with the breaking news that the FDA has traced the deadly spinach we learned about yesterday to a California company. It's been a bad week for spinach, people. Anyway, this must be pretty serious because we've got Sanjay! Remember when Sanjay used to pop up whenever a story contained anything that might in any remote way be related to something medical? I guess now that he's BFF with Bill Clinton he's too good to explain cold symptoms. Heh. Kidding, Sanjay. So our Dr. Gupta gives us some info on E Coli and then scurries off to save lives. Or something.

Next John tells us that things are so bad in Baghdad they're digging ditches around the city. Michael Ware joins us and clarifies that actually the whole ditch thing is just a suggestion right now from the Ministry of Interior. They got the idea from something that happened thousands of years ago. Um, what? Oh, I'm sure that will work just peachy. Michael explains that this war will be won or lost in Baghdad and Al Anbar province has basically been taken over by Al Qaeda. It seems we are constantly securing an area and then giving control back over to the very same Iraqi troops who are connected to all these killings. Ahhh!!! Will it ever end? Stay safe Michael.

On now to a piece from Suzanne Malveaux on Bush and his desire to alter the Geneva Conventions. It seems he's hit a snag though because we've got ourselves a republican revolt here from the likes of McCain, Warner, Graham, and even Colin Powell. After the piece we get Suzanne, Dana Bash, and John King live and they discuss the battle that is about to ensue in Congress. The House will most likely pass something similar to what Bush wants (because as a whole they're pretty nuts) while the Senate is balking. The democrats, meanwhile, are just sitting back and chilling while the other side eats its own. I don't even know what to say about this except that Bush clearly believes in what he's doing and he is so clearly wrong.

We get Gary now in Havana with a piece on a Summit held by a whole bunch of people that hate us. A who's who of US enemies if you will. Castro was the official host, but since he's hospital bound his brother Raul did the speeches. I can understand why the US wouldn't go to something like this, but I really wish they would speak with these people one on one. I normally don't agree with anything Bernie Goldberg says, but after Mike Wallace's "60 Minutes" interview with Ahmadinejad, he said that what he took away from the interview was that the Iranian president understands us better than we understand him. This is a problem that can only be solved with dialog. After Gary's piece John tells us that we were suppose to have Gary live, but technical difficulties were preventing that from happening. "Nothing nefarious," was going on he assures us. Technical difficulties my ass. I know what this is. Those Warren Jeffs followers finally got to him. We're coming for you Gary! Don't marry anyone! Or, you know, it's technical difficulties. Heh.

Next up Joe Johns gives us a piece on Bob Ney, the Ohio republican that's going down with the falling Abramoff house of cards. Apparently he has a drinking problem too. Well, one corrupt Congress member down, probably a few hundred more to go. After this we get a preview on Anderson's special that's up next. I'm not going to blog it, but I did watch and thought it was very good. I liked the last piece best and was blown away how that girl had Bin Ladin's name on her locker. So what did you think?

We transition now to our faith and values correspondant, Delia Gallagher, who informs us that the Pope has been a little insulting to Muslims. Apparently he read a quote that wasn't kind to the prophet Muhammad. Now Muslims everywhere are mad. Pakistan is mad. Turkey wants an apology. It's just a big mess. The Vatican is surprised at the response. Uh, were they not watching tv during the whole cartoon thing? When these kind of things happen I like to flip them around to see how I would feel. So I replaced Muhammad with Jesus and I guess I'd be a little miffed-though not enough to riot. I'm more of a letter writer myself. After Delia's piece we get a live interview with a representative from the moderate Muslim community and he urges interfaith dialog. Amen, brother.

On now to a Sanjay piece over the discovery that some people in vegetative states are actually very aware. Alright, stop right there right wingers. I know what you're thinking. The whole Terri Schiavo incident was a much different circumstance. Her brain was deprived of oxygen whereas the woman in the piece had blunt brain trauma. Live Sanjay follows his piece and informs us that in the future people in these kind of states may be able to communicate through brain scans. Freaky...and cool. As we go to commercial they promo Sanjay's Genius special that is coming up and John mentions that there are, "no geniuses in this room." Uh oh. The look on his face is priceless as he realizes he just insulted the whole crew. Oh John, leave the self deprecating schtick to Anderson. It's totally not working for you.

Next up we have a Dan Simon piece on a 52 year old woman serving in Afghanistan. This is a bummer of a piece because after seeing some old interview footage of her we find out that the truck bomb that happened right when Anderson got into the country on Friday actually drove directly into her humvee and now she's gone. So sad.

The Shot tonight is National Geographic footage of a shark versus an octopus. It was a steel cage deathmatch, people, but to me it looks like the octopus emerged victorious. As we conclude the hour John tries to redeem himself by stating he's "dumber than a box of rocks," because everyone in the studio is now mad at him. Heh. They are so telling on him when Anderson gets back. Well, that's all for tonight because next up is a special. B


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great recap! Thanks!

10:11 AM  
Blogger eliza said...

You're welcome, anonymous. I hope you come back and comment some more. :)

3:00 PM  

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